[ The moments where Tidus stare at him stretch out into an eternity. And as the gaze lasts, every single alarm bell inside of Inigo's mind is going off. Telling him that it's a dumb idea that he actually said. That Tidus is going to get out of the water and walk away. That he's going to tell Inigo this is ridiculous.
His heart beats so quickly in his chest, with anticipation and nerves and near-terror. Inigo briefly contemplates just leaving this situation himself. Just get up and leave before Tidus has the chance to, before Inigo has to endure the pain of watching that happen.
But Tidus doesn't walk away. Tidus leans in, lips pressing against Inigo's own.
He can feel his blood racing through his body, feel it in his ears as his heart goes faster and faster. The steam of the bath is making it almost impossible to breathe, or maybe that's his own feelings going haywire as his mind reconfirms over and over that yes, yes, that is Tidus kissing him.
Inigo gasps a little into the kiss, just so caught off guard by this proceeding in not a single way he actually anticipated, but then he moves his arms. They feel weirdly heavy, like he's in a daze, but he manages to wrap them around the back of Tidus's shoulders.
So he can press his whole body a little closer, making it easier for him to sink deeper into the kiss as well.
This is happening.
Tidus is kissing him.
It's really happening.
It's really happening, and Tidus's kiss is everything he imagined. Or those are just his rose-colored glasses talking, completely taking over. ]
[ It's been a while, hasn't it. The act of kissing familiar, but the lips he does not. Would he know what familiar was, if he were to have the chance now? But Tidus isn't thinking about another, about anyone else. Inigo draws in, and Tidus meets him with a tilt of his head, a kiss that's becoming bolder by the second. The question returns of what just Inigo is fine with, before he tosses it a second time, his mouth opening a fraction to let his tongue the tip of his tongue flick at Inigo's upper lip, trapping it to gently tug and release. Returning without pause, resuming without hesitation.
This is fine, isn't it? The chest pressed against his firmer than he's used to, but he doesn't mind. He takes his hand not around Inigo's shoulders and slides it up from collar, to neck; fingertips meeting the wet strands of hair that guide him to stroke along the lower jaw he finds, tangling close to the roots.
Maybe he should stop, keep this short. But Tidus doesn't consider it, doesn't think. He just wants to sink into this kiss for as long as he can get away with, take what he can get. ]
[ Of course Inigo doesn't mind it. Any of it. Tidus could do pretty much anything to him right now, and he would be absolutely fine with it.
After all, this is exactly the sort of thing he imagined so often before, but thought he'd never have. The arms still around Tidus's shoulders, the thumbs on his hands starting to move against said shoulders with slow, circling motions, showing that he's very much still into this.
Then again, it's not like he's really having this. He's just having it for the moment. Inigo knows. It's just like Tidus said - it's a temporary moment, just because Tidus misses this. Because Inigo misses this. It doesn't mean that Inigo's feelings are reflected in Tidus's heart, or ever will be. And maybe Inigo is going to majorly regret this due to that fact later.
But he's not thinking about later. Not as long as he has this moment. Maybe he can just stretch this moment out into forever. Inigo isn't even thinking about whether anyone could just walk into the carriage at any moment now and see this, that's how caught up in it he is. All of his usual worries are gone.
Instead there's just this.
Instead Inigo opens his mouth a little, his lips spreading in the kiss, a silent invitation. Not wanting to be the one to push this a little further first, just in case it'd chase Tidus off, but leaving it up to the other to proceed if he wants. It's okay. ]
[ It's not an invitation Tidus misses, tongue already darting across lips, the tiny kisses he leaves with it. He only pauses for the tongue that might dip out in search for his, before being the one to sink in. Tasting warmth, the brush of one tongue across another sending shivers through him that threaten to make him gasp.
The pads of his fingers on Inigo's shoulder press against skin, like a grip to reassure him that this is real, this is reality. But it doesn't stay, travelling downward, slipping along the shape of Inigo's figure, muscle and skin all the way to his hip. Water tries to to push him back, but he ignores it, only stopping as the tell-tale rim of shorts knock his finger.
He bumps himself to the body already against him, smoothing himself for in for an inch he isn't going to find, but unable to resist, unwilling to believe that they can't meld closer into one. But there's a peace, even in that desire. A comfort wanted and found, his heart a nervous thing in his chest that continues to seek for more. The quietest voice telling him he should stop, say something, a nagging that he can't quite dispel, or that makes Tidus drag this out more and more. That if he stops, pulls back, shows any signs of stopping, Inigo won't want to pick back up where they left off.
--is it that? Or just the simple fact he doesn't want to.
But he does, in time. Not rushed, not hurried, pulling back and leaving tiny kisses, taking everything he can get. Lips and mouth parting, but still even then, going back for one last held kiss. Then, finally, his forehead tipping to Inigo's, his hand at the side of his jaw drawing back to brush at his cheek.
No words come. He only looks at Inigo, captivated, wondering now - was there anything to say?
If Inigo agrees with silence that there's nothing, then he'll angle himself, kiss the side of his friend's mouth and start a slow trail to lead him down by his kiss, skip halfway down his neck. ]
[ What would there even be to say in a moment like this? It only feels like any word might break what's going on here, as if the two of them are under a spell that will end the moment one of them utters a single word.
And Inigo doesn't want it to end. Not so soon, not when he's realising how much he loves the touch of Tidus's actual hands on his body. Real, this time, not just imagined by Inigo during what passes for night in this place, lying on his bunk and thinking what Tidus's touch along his skin would feel like, the fingers pressing into his flesh and muscles. How will he be able to give this up again later? (Don't think about it, don't think.)
So all that comes out of Inigo's mouth is just a small gasp when Tidus's kisses start to move away from his mouth, giving the space for the noises to actually be released to the air.
His arms move to give Tidus a bit more space to move, but also so he can move his hands up and start to dig his fingers straight into Tidus's hair. Fingers threading through locks, as if seeking for something, trying to find purchase in the middle of this dizzying feeling.
But all of it is just encouragement. Because he wants more, only more. No matter what rational thought may tell him in this moment - Inigo knows what his feelings tell him, what his body tells him. Don't stop these kisses now. Kiss him more, or tell him to kiss in return, or-- or anything. Anything at all. ]
[ Inigo gasps, breathes, and each hint of involuntary response clings to Tidus's skin, goading him better than any words could. Should he be leaving Inigo's mouth and going down like this, taking this further than just a normal makeout? But when he hears Inigo pleased, he can't help but want to give him more. I can do more, I can make you feel good.
His tongue follows licks along the thick band of muscle of the neck, his mouth sucking on where it stops; the arm around Inigo's waist angling higher as he holds him to guide him backward, letting his arm be what knocks the edge of the pool Tidus is taking him to. All so he can slip a leg between Inigo's and face him better, the hand that had been tilted in Inigo's hair returning but slipping farther in; lips wrapping around where his adam's apple is, teasing with light flicks to the skin, teasing at the space.
Does he know what he's doing? Not really. He just hopes to keep going, fumbling his way through this effort, the gentle tug at his hair encouraging, pleasant. Hand dropping from Inigo's head and landing on his chest, palm rubbing against the nipple, the muscle of the pec.
--or, is it okay It's flatter than what he's used to, and it's easy to doubt just how to control his hand. He sets it to the side, a little unsure what to do with it immediately. ]
[ It's incredibly easy to guide Inigo along. It's as if he just needs the slightest hint or nudge to move right along with Tidus right now, shuddering a little when he can feel that leg between his own. Realising that just this by itself is further than Inigo has ever gone with anyone else before - but it doesn't feel like a thought worthy of stopping all of this for.
Especially when he can feel Tidus's hand sink onto his chest, and then awkwardly move it off to the side. It brings some confusion to Inigo at first, his head much lighter than usually between all the steam and their current activity, but then he realises.
Tidus has never done this with a guy before. Or if he has, not often. This isn't what he's used to.
Show him, a voice inside of his head urges him on. He's the expert here when it comes to that, right? Even if Inigo doesn't have experience with doing this with other guys himself, he at least knows his own body well enough. He's had enough fantasies.
So while he doesn't move out of their current position, still giving Tidus full access to his neck and anywhere else the other guy wants to land his lips on, one hand slips out of Tidus's hair to move down to the other's chest as well. First landing on his shoulder, then slowly slipping down, teasing the other's nipples. ]
Like this.. [ He mumbles, though it's hardly even audible over the sound of the water, of the ambient sound still playing in the background. Were those words really said out loud?
His hand moves down further, traveling to Tidus's stomach, tracing the lines of the muscle there. ]
[ Ah. The wandering kisses to Inigo's throat stop when he feels the tease of fingers to his nipples, a breath hitching in his lungs at the sensitive treatment. Or not treatment, but simply him, what he likes. Paused in the moment where he wants to enjoy the sensation, the hand exploring his body and the spark of embarrassment that isn't quite sincere, but quickly turns so when he hears the muttered direction. Hard to miss, even as soft as it is, with his ears close to the lips that speak them. ]
Oh-- okay. [ Tidus takes the guidance like a child, placing the curve of his hand and thumb at the side and nudging, a soft massage to disturb the muscle, catching against the nipple to brush into it. He's moved his head to watch and give it focus, feeling rather clumsy, dumb; like this should be obvious, but it really isn't. Hesitant eyes moving onto Inigo's face, and it feels like the first time in a while he's really looking at him - acknowledging him proper. ]
Are you... is this okay? [ What we're doing, he means, though what this exactly is -- he couldn't say. He's lost sight of what this was meant to be from the first moan, and the way Inigo's touch to his stomach left felt lower than it was.
But for the uncertainty that's been given room to exist, he looks at Inigo's lips and finds them compelling, an urge to kiss them that he holds back on. ]
[ Maybe it was a mistake to speak up. Even if it was just two words slipping out of his mouth before he really thought about them, it still brought forth more words in the end. Tidus speaking up as well, asking him that question.
It's surprisingly considerate, but Inigo's cheeks just flush in response. Maybe because of the question, but most likely in part due to Tidus's ministrations too. ]
.. yeah. [ He finally manages to say, a near soundless agreement. More air than sound. ] I.. I want to be close to someone too.
[ Even if it goes a little beyond that for him, but Inigo can fall back on his usual habit and shove that all down. Not even think about it too much for now.
His hand is still moving across Tidus's abs, drawing idle shapes on them as he talks. ]
It feels safe with you. [ Maybe he can at least admit to that, in lieu of the full picture. ]
[ Inigo's touch tickles him without the humour. The way it sticks to you, senses high and skin alight. It's a lot, what a simple touch, and Tidus rests his head against the smooth of Inigo's shoulder, running his own hand down along the length to his waist, meeting water. ]
You can't make fun of me if I get things wrong, [ he jokes, as light as a joke can be conveyed. Head lifting again to tilt into the side of hair, rubbing gently into it. ] Guys are a lil' different from girls.
[ A lot different.
Or maybe not, not really. There's still a mouth that he can kiss, a body he can hold, and he turns his face to Inigo's, planting a kiss on his cheek. Another higher, another by his temple...
He doesn't even think about it until he's done, and he wonders, looking back at Inigo, a furrow to his brow. ]
[ The final question is immediately met with a small shake of Inigo's head. Almost too quickly, like he wants to make sure the idea leaves Tidus's mind before it can settle there in the slightest. ]
No. I like it this way..
[ Even if it's just a temporary thing. That doesn't mean he can't still enjoy it, right? Just being close with someone, soft with someone - especially when it happens to be the very specific someone he has a crush on in the first place.
Inigo completely lets go of Tidus for a moment, but it's just so he can put his hands on the other guy's cheeks and pull his mouth towards his own, pressing their lips together in a brief, relatively chaste kiss this time before pulling back. ]
I'm a bit more worried about.. erm. Making this weird, because I'm a guy.. [ And since Tidus, just like he's admitting again now, isn't used to that. ] You'll let me know if anything is too much, right?
[ It's a bit more communicating out loud than he'd like to be doing right now.
But his care and worry over Tidus take priority over that. ]
[ The kiss is soft and short; the kind that makes Tidus want to fall back into it, have it last longer. But this display of communication has broken a certain spell too, or allowed in the reality they were ignoring. His hands rest on Inigo a little more shyly now, his uncertainty having a voice outside his head. ]
Uh, well, it should be okay. Guys have the same kind of mouths. You know -- like girls? So it's not that weird anyway!
[ SMART BRAIN THINKING. And that smart brain is still going, as Tidus glances down between them, then looks back up with a unsteady gaze. ]
Unless you're talking about anything like-- you know. [ You know. Said in a lower voice. ]
[ If Inigo's face was already red before, it's now positively starting to look like a complete tomato. Just the thought of that is enough to make him feel like exploding on the spot, and he quickly shakes his head. Please, no more of this smart brain! ]
I-I just.. meant.. you know, I don't have any.. [ .. Boobs. He means boobs, okay. But saying that out loud like this feels weird! Besides, there's so many other possible worries when he thinks about it. Maybe all of this feels different with a guy than with a girl? Maybe kissing a guy is different than kissing a girl, even when mouths are the same? Who knows. ]
But as long as you like the kissing..
[ Inigo's gaze momentarily drops - but thankfully more off to the side, rather than down to Tidus's shorts - before shyly looking back at the other.
He doesn't continue the sentence, but hopefully the implication is there. If Tidus likes the kissing, then Inigo does too. ]
[ Doesn't have any...? Perhaps in reflection, it takes Tidus an embarrassingly few seconds longer than it maybe should to know what Inigo means. Speaking in the plural, and Tidus's thoughts down below, and what exactly does Inigo think girls have two of down there?
--but oh. Oh, he maybe means breasts, but more importantly is that Inigo doesn't seem too bothered by keeping it to kissing to now. He feels that lingering suggestion -- an invitation, even. At least, that's the way it rests with Tidus, with his eyes returning on Inigo's empty lips one second, moving in to kiss them by the next. A chaste kiss despite his earlier disappointment, if lingering a few seconds more.
Mouth breaking away by only inches, face kept close. Hands resting on Inigo's waist. ]
I like kissing, [ he confirms. A beat passing, and then- ]
...Do you wanna go back to our room? Might be more private.
Inigo just stares at Tidus for a moment. Only a moment, since he realises that staring for longer than that may be taken badly in a situation like this, like he doesn't really want to go back to their room. And that's not it at all, it's just--
Tidus wants to keep kissing with him. Even if they switch locations right now, he doesn't just want to stop entirely the moment they leave the spa. Even if they go to their cabin, he wants to keep kissing there for now.
It's an incredibly startling thought, and Inigo can feel his heart beating so rapidly that for a moment he wonders if he may just pass out right here and now in the water and end this in the dumbest way possible.
But he doesn't. Thank Naga. His hands move to Tidus's shoulders, landing on there, and this time he leans in for a small kiss. Like he can't really get enough either. (Like he has to confirm, once more, that this is real.) ]
Y.. Yeah. I guess it would be a lot to explain if someone suddenly did show up..
[ It was easier to dismiss the rest of the train in the heat of their kissing, but now... it's not entirely on his mind, but Tidus knows what privacy here is like. Sometimes you can grab it for moments; most of the time, you're lucky to experience it. He only figures that so many people being younger than they should has afforded them this spare time. After all, who's going to think to bring kids to a spa? Or even to hide out in one?
(Other than they did.)
So, maybe not getting caught and giving the wrong impression's the best idea here. His voice comes out a note higher, a bit giddy, a bitty elated as he moves back in the pool. ]
Okay! [ Okay! Cool! He knows how to do this, he knows how to act. At least the pool is fairly simple to move out of, though there's almost something that makes him want to stay. A dumb something that Tidus ignores, wet patches left around his feet on the tiling. ]
I could spend all day in that thing. [ He's gotta admit, the hot water's pretty nice. ] Remember the one on that island? The hot springs. Man, I could go for a vacation!
[ He's not talking simply to fill in any potential silence as he walks over to his gear. Nope, you can't prove it. ]
[ Tidus's saving grace in this situation is that Inigo is just as nervous right now, which makes him completely unable to pick up on any tone in the way Tidus talks. No, to him it just comes across as Tidus having a tight grip on the situation, even as Inigo still feels kind of weirdly fluttery in his stomach, his hands shaking a little as he moves some damp hairs out of his face as he climbs out of the pool.
.. they're still shaking a little when he grabs two of the towels and throws one over at Tidus. By Naga, this feels so weird. Not even necessarily a bad kind of weird, just.. weirdly exciting and nerve-inducing all at the same time. Like a kid on Christmas Eve. ]
I don't think-- I don't think they'll give us one again this soon. [ Even though that island feels like so long ago now. But in train terms, it's the first real vacation they've had. Not counting the winter faire, since that was only for a day, more a day out than a real vacation..
Also no, that's totally not him stuttering and stammering a bit. He's so cool. He's totally cool as he starts drying himself off enough to be able to put his clothes back on. ]
Maybe we should just come here more often. [ In the spa. Then again, usually there's more company than this, and Inigo isn't so fond of that idea.. ]
Hmm, that wouldn't be bad. How about... --after practices? Relax in a hot pool? We're getting closer to a mission. We should start doing more regular. Rol still knows how to knock me to the ground. [ Pah! Or so he starts, but then quickly turns more amused: ] Wouldn't mind seeing him try that now!
[ Tidus's saving grace is also another factor: He knows how to keep his mouth going, on and on and on. He's dried and dressed as he keeps on talking, his body temperature stuffy with the clothing, but he doesn't think about that as he heads to the door, fiddling first with the controls to shut off the sound. Good bye, nature pee noises.
He lingers by the door to wait for Inigo, likely catching his eye, and delaying in looking away. Or at least, trying to make it seem natural. Sure, he's brought up about the whole friends doing more than friends do doing thing in the past, but... it doesn't mean he's ever done it before.
Is this what they're doing now? Is this for real?
His heel taps against the ground, until they're ready to go through into the corridor, heading back to their cabin. ]
[ It takes Inigo a bit more to get dressed. Mostly since he's so nervous that he keeps making dumb little mistakes - like trying to shove both of his legs down the same pipe of his pants. That's obviously not going to work. And the most he screws up and delays them getting out of here, the more flustered he's becoming.
It really is a good thing there's just Tidus's running commentary as background noise. Even though Inigo feels a little guilty for having taken longer, considering he can see Tidus playing out his idle animation by the time he finally is done putting everything back on. ]
Okay-- Ready, I'm ready!
[ Eager to prove He Is Ready, Inigo quickly moves past Tidus, opening the door to leave. Bouncing on his feet with nervous energy as he heads through the corridor, in the direction of their cabin - though he turns to actually look at Tidus as he's walking, making sure the other is still following him.
And that all of this - whatever this is right now - is not just a weird hallucination he's having. ]
.. you're not really going to make Roland fight you while he's all old, are you? [ Thank Naga for a Safe Topic while they make their way back. ]
[ Wow Inigo, you're gonna overtake him? It surprises Tidus briefly, but he's following anyway, walking the line somewhere between being on automatic, and being sure this is some big crazy dream they've found themselves in. People are turning into kids, and they've decided to make out now?
Or maybe they woke up, and now they're ignoring what happened in said dream. But he's the one who decided not to make a deal out of it, isn't he. ]
Why not? [ And continues to go for, with the opening he has. ...so he thinks, but there's a follow-up that he hesitates to bring out - shoves his hands into his pockets, and pretends it isn't weird at all, when- ]
You gonna keep me distracted?
[ If you know what I mean.
But it doesn't come out as teasing as Tidus usually is, and his cheeks feel a pinch of warmth for even saying it after all. He won't take it back though - can't take back what's been said. ]
It's a miracle that Inigo doesn't suddenly stop walking, or even worse, trip over his own feet with how startled he is at those sudden words. You gonna keep me distracted? Does Tidus mean that in the sort of way Inigo thinks he does? Usually he would assume it's not the case, that it's just some innocent teasing, but considering what they just did and what they're about to continue when they get to their cabin, it feels like the words suddenly got a very, very heavy double load.
Inigo can absolutely feel that blush starting to creep up his cheeks now. ]
W-Well..
[ What does he even say to that.
It has to be something cool! He can't make Tidus think he's lame now!
Come on, Inigo. Think. Think. ]
I, uh.. if you want me to..? [ DAMMIT, NO, THAT'S SO LAME. HE'S MENTALLY SCREAMING INTO A PILLOW RIGHT NOW. It's like he's doing an accidental speedrun on how quickly he can get Tidus turned off on the idea of ever sharing even a single kiss with him again. ]
[ --Ugh. He said something really uncool now, didn't he? He didn't sell it at all, and Inigo doesn't even sound like he knows what he's on about. Great job, Tidus, good work!
If he could shove his hands deeper into his pockets, he would. ]
Nevermind. Just a joke.
[ He's so glad Inigo can't see him right now, making the job more difficult by him pretending to have an interest in the side wall away from the row of doors. Wow, good thing their cabin is only one car away!
(Will Inigo still want to make out with him? ughhh) ]
[ Is he this bad at this? Oh no. He's this bad at this, isn't he. Just look at Tidus - every single inch of him a very, very sulky teenager right at this point, to a point where it's causing Inigo quite some mental panic. This definitely isn't the kind of mood he wanted to put the other in, even if it happened accidentally.
So Inigo's nervous, panic-filled brain is trying to think up more as quickly as possible. A way to deal with all of this. A way to make Tidus feel better. Think, think, think--
Oh, look. It's their cabin. Inigo quickly pulls out his ticket to open the door, glad to find that neither of their roommates are currently present.
It gives him an opportunity to make up for this awkwardness. By shoving his ticket back into a pocket on his pants as quickly as possible, and instead tug on Tidus's arms until his hands appear out of the pockets. So he can grasp those instead, tugging the other along into the room as the door shuts behind them. ]
Don't make that face.
[ You know the one. The sulky one. But Inigo says it with a tone that's weirdly warm, almost a tad vulnerable as he releases one hand to instead touch the side of Tidus's face, pulling him a bit down and closer for a kiss. ]
Or-- Is that what I need to distract you from? [ A semi-awkward callback to the joke gone wrong, but it's cute in that incredibly dorky sort of way. ]
[ Tidus doesn't mean to come off any one way. If any, he'd want to think he comes off casual, unaffected, but Tidus has never been great at completely masking his feelings. The pout on his lips, chewing on the inside of his cheek; to him, he's just making his resting face, obviously.
But Inigo reads him better, even if Tidus doesn't agree as they walk through the door - or as Inigo tugs him inside, a colour of light next to the boring wall he'd been casually viewing. Smiling, but Tidus is ready to protest that accusation, before his lips are put to another use.
And then - Tidus knows there's a reference being made here, but his mind stays a muddled mess as Inigo pulls away, trying to figure out how to respond, and quick. ]
I-- Sure?
[ Got it.
(does this mean inigo's going to kiss him again...!) ]
[ It means exactly that, since Inigo draws him in for another kiss.
If only most things in life were as easy as earning kisses from Inigo. Then again, he's quite eager to kiss Tidus - the butterflies in his stomach tell him as much every time their lips meet - so it's not like he needs much of an excuse to do so, no matter how good of an excuse Tidus's cute face when he responds so hastily is.
He lingers a bit longer this time too. Taking the lead this time, gently tugging on Tidus's (perhaps still faintly pouty) lower lip.
It lasts long enough that Inigo feels a little out of breath when he finally does pull his head back. ]
Um, if you want more, you should tell me.. Or-- Or maybe we should set some boundaries. On all of this, I mean. [ On what they're doing here. Especially since Inigo wants to know what Tidus wants out of this - he's very well aware of his own feelings, and that they don't fit as neatly into this situation. ]
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blitzcheer) wrote2020-04-28 11:07 am
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His heart beats so quickly in his chest, with anticipation and nerves and near-terror. Inigo briefly contemplates just leaving this situation himself. Just get up and leave before Tidus has the chance to, before Inigo has to endure the pain of watching that happen.
But Tidus doesn't walk away. Tidus leans in, lips pressing against Inigo's own.
He can feel his blood racing through his body, feel it in his ears as his heart goes faster and faster. The steam of the bath is making it almost impossible to breathe, or maybe that's his own feelings going haywire as his mind reconfirms over and over that yes, yes, that is Tidus kissing him.
Inigo gasps a little into the kiss, just so caught off guard by this proceeding in not a single way he actually anticipated, but then he moves his arms. They feel weirdly heavy, like he's in a daze, but he manages to wrap them around the back of Tidus's shoulders.
So he can press his whole body a little closer, making it easier for him to sink deeper into the kiss as well.
This is happening.
Tidus is kissing him.
It's really happening.
It's really happening, and Tidus's kiss is everything he imagined. Or those are just his rose-colored glasses talking, completely taking over. ]
no subject
This is fine, isn't it? The chest pressed against his firmer than he's used to, but he doesn't mind. He takes his hand not around Inigo's shoulders and slides it up from collar, to neck; fingertips meeting the wet strands of hair that guide him to stroke along the lower jaw he finds, tangling close to the roots.
Maybe he should stop, keep this short. But Tidus doesn't consider it, doesn't think. He just wants to sink into this kiss for as long as he can get away with, take what he can get. ]
no subject
After all, this is exactly the sort of thing he imagined so often before, but thought he'd never have. The arms still around Tidus's shoulders, the thumbs on his hands starting to move against said shoulders with slow, circling motions, showing that he's very much still into this.
Then again, it's not like he's really having this. He's just having it for the moment. Inigo knows. It's just like Tidus said - it's a temporary moment, just because Tidus misses this. Because Inigo misses this. It doesn't mean that Inigo's feelings are reflected in Tidus's heart, or ever will be. And maybe Inigo is going to majorly regret this due to that fact later.
But he's not thinking about later. Not as long as he has this moment. Maybe he can just stretch this moment out into forever. Inigo isn't even thinking about whether anyone could just walk into the carriage at any moment now and see this, that's how caught up in it he is. All of his usual worries are gone.
Instead there's just this.
Instead Inigo opens his mouth a little, his lips spreading in the kiss, a silent invitation. Not wanting to be the one to push this a little further first, just in case it'd chase Tidus off, but leaving it up to the other to proceed if he wants. It's okay. ]
no subject
The pads of his fingers on Inigo's shoulder press against skin, like a grip to reassure him that this is real, this is reality. But it doesn't stay, travelling downward, slipping along the shape of Inigo's figure, muscle and skin all the way to his hip. Water tries to to push him back, but he ignores it, only stopping as the tell-tale rim of shorts knock his finger.
He bumps himself to the body already against him, smoothing himself for in for an inch he isn't going to find, but unable to resist, unwilling to believe that they can't meld closer into one. But there's a peace, even in that desire. A comfort wanted and found, his heart a nervous thing in his chest that continues to seek for more. The quietest voice telling him he should stop, say something, a nagging that he can't quite dispel, or that makes Tidus drag this out more and more. That if he stops, pulls back, shows any signs of stopping, Inigo won't want to pick back up where they left off.
--is it that? Or just the simple fact he doesn't want to.
But he does, in time. Not rushed, not hurried, pulling back and leaving tiny kisses, taking everything he can get. Lips and mouth parting, but still even then, going back for one last held kiss. Then, finally, his forehead tipping to Inigo's, his hand at the side of his jaw drawing back to brush at his cheek.
No words come. He only looks at Inigo, captivated, wondering now - was there anything to say?
If Inigo agrees with silence that there's nothing, then he'll angle himself, kiss the side of his friend's mouth and start a slow trail to lead him down by his kiss, skip halfway down his neck. ]
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And Inigo doesn't want it to end. Not so soon, not when he's realising how much he loves the touch of Tidus's actual hands on his body. Real, this time, not just imagined by Inigo during what passes for night in this place, lying on his bunk and thinking what Tidus's touch along his skin would feel like, the fingers pressing into his flesh and muscles. How will he be able to give this up again later? (Don't think about it, don't think.)
So all that comes out of Inigo's mouth is just a small gasp when Tidus's kisses start to move away from his mouth, giving the space for the noises to actually be released to the air.
His arms move to give Tidus a bit more space to move, but also so he can move his hands up and start to dig his fingers straight into Tidus's hair. Fingers threading through locks, as if seeking for something, trying to find purchase in the middle of this dizzying feeling.
But all of it is just encouragement. Because he wants more, only more. No matter what rational thought may tell him in this moment - Inigo knows what his feelings tell him, what his body tells him. Don't stop these kisses now. Kiss him more, or tell him to kiss in return, or-- or anything. Anything at all. ]
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His tongue follows licks along the thick band of muscle of the neck, his mouth sucking on where it stops; the arm around Inigo's waist angling higher as he holds him to guide him backward, letting his arm be what knocks the edge of the pool Tidus is taking him to. All so he can slip a leg between Inigo's and face him better, the hand that had been tilted in Inigo's hair returning but slipping farther in; lips wrapping around where his adam's apple is, teasing with light flicks to the skin, teasing at the space.
Does he know what he's doing? Not really. He just hopes to keep going, fumbling his way through this effort, the gentle tug at his hair encouraging, pleasant. Hand dropping from Inigo's head and landing on his chest, palm rubbing against the nipple, the muscle of the pec.
--or, is it okay It's flatter than what he's used to, and it's easy to doubt just how to control his hand. He sets it to the side, a little unsure what to do with it immediately. ]
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Especially when he can feel Tidus's hand sink onto his chest, and then awkwardly move it off to the side. It brings some confusion to Inigo at first, his head much lighter than usually between all the steam and their current activity, but then he realises.
Tidus has never done this with a guy before. Or if he has, not often. This isn't what he's used to.
Show him, a voice inside of his head urges him on. He's the expert here when it comes to that, right? Even if Inigo doesn't have experience with doing this with other guys himself, he at least knows his own body well enough. He's had enough fantasies.
So while he doesn't move out of their current position, still giving Tidus full access to his neck and anywhere else the other guy wants to land his lips on, one hand slips out of Tidus's hair to move down to the other's chest as well. First landing on his shoulder, then slowly slipping down, teasing the other's nipples. ]
Like this.. [ He mumbles, though it's hardly even audible over the sound of the water, of the ambient sound still playing in the background. Were those words really said out loud?
His hand moves down further, traveling to Tidus's stomach, tracing the lines of the muscle there. ]
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Oh-- okay. [ Tidus takes the guidance like a child, placing the curve of his hand and thumb at the side and nudging, a soft massage to disturb the muscle, catching against the nipple to brush into it. He's moved his head to watch and give it focus, feeling rather clumsy, dumb; like this should be obvious, but it really isn't. Hesitant eyes moving onto Inigo's face, and it feels like the first time in a while he's really looking at him - acknowledging him proper. ]
Are you... is this okay? [ What we're doing, he means, though what this exactly is -- he couldn't say. He's lost sight of what this was meant to be from the first moan, and the way Inigo's touch to his stomach left felt lower than it was.
But for the uncertainty that's been given room to exist, he looks at Inigo's lips and finds them compelling, an urge to kiss them that he holds back on. ]
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It's surprisingly considerate, but Inigo's cheeks just flush in response. Maybe because of the question, but most likely in part due to Tidus's ministrations too. ]
.. yeah. [ He finally manages to say, a near soundless agreement. More air than sound. ] I.. I want to be close to someone too.
[ Even if it goes a little beyond that for him, but Inigo can fall back on his usual habit and shove that all down. Not even think about it too much for now.
His hand is still moving across Tidus's abs, drawing idle shapes on them as he talks. ]
It feels safe with you. [ Maybe he can at least admit to that, in lieu of the full picture. ]
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You can't make fun of me if I get things wrong, [ he jokes, as light as a joke can be conveyed. Head lifting again to tilt into the side of hair, rubbing gently into it. ] Guys are a lil' different from girls.
[ A lot different.
Or maybe not, not really. There's still a mouth that he can kiss, a body he can hold, and he turns his face to Inigo's, planting a kiss on his cheek. Another higher, another by his temple...
He doesn't even think about it until he's done, and he wonders, looking back at Inigo, a furrow to his brow. ]
Uh-- am I being...too soft?
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No. I like it this way..
[ Even if it's just a temporary thing. That doesn't mean he can't still enjoy it, right? Just being close with someone, soft with someone - especially when it happens to be the very specific someone he has a crush on in the first place.
Inigo completely lets go of Tidus for a moment, but it's just so he can put his hands on the other guy's cheeks and pull his mouth towards his own, pressing their lips together in a brief, relatively chaste kiss this time before pulling back. ]
I'm a bit more worried about.. erm. Making this weird, because I'm a guy.. [ And since Tidus, just like he's admitting again now, isn't used to that. ] You'll let me know if anything is too much, right?
[ It's a bit more communicating out loud than he'd like to be doing right now.
But his care and worry over Tidus take priority over that. ]
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Uh, well, it should be okay. Guys have the same kind of mouths. You know -- like girls? So it's not that weird anyway!
[ SMART BRAIN THINKING. And that smart brain is still going, as Tidus glances down between them, then looks back up with a unsteady gaze. ]
Unless you're talking about anything like-- you know. [ You know. Said in a lower voice. ]
...maybe we can wait on that?
[ (still low) ]
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[ If Inigo's face was already red before, it's now positively starting to look like a complete tomato. Just the thought of that is enough to make him feel like exploding on the spot, and he quickly shakes his head. Please, no more of this smart brain! ]
I-I just.. meant.. you know, I don't have any.. [ .. Boobs. He means boobs, okay. But saying that out loud like this feels weird! Besides, there's so many other possible worries when he thinks about it. Maybe all of this feels different with a guy than with a girl? Maybe kissing a guy is different than kissing a girl, even when mouths are the same? Who knows. ]
But as long as you like the kissing..
[ Inigo's gaze momentarily drops - but thankfully more off to the side, rather than down to Tidus's shorts - before shyly looking back at the other.
He doesn't continue the sentence, but hopefully the implication is there. If Tidus likes the kissing, then Inigo does too. ]
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--but oh. Oh, he maybe means breasts, but more importantly is that Inigo doesn't seem too bothered by keeping it to kissing to now. He feels that lingering suggestion -- an invitation, even. At least, that's the way it rests with Tidus, with his eyes returning on Inigo's empty lips one second, moving in to kiss them by the next. A chaste kiss despite his earlier disappointment, if lingering a few seconds more.
Mouth breaking away by only inches, face kept close. Hands resting on Inigo's waist. ]
I like kissing, [ he confirms. A beat passing, and then- ]
...Do you wanna go back to our room? Might be more private.
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Inigo just stares at Tidus for a moment. Only a moment, since he realises that staring for longer than that may be taken badly in a situation like this, like he doesn't really want to go back to their room. And that's not it at all, it's just--
Tidus wants to keep kissing with him. Even if they switch locations right now, he doesn't just want to stop entirely the moment they leave the spa. Even if they go to their cabin, he wants to keep kissing there for now.
It's an incredibly startling thought, and Inigo can feel his heart beating so rapidly that for a moment he wonders if he may just pass out right here and now in the water and end this in the dumbest way possible.
But he doesn't. Thank Naga. His hands move to Tidus's shoulders, landing on there, and this time he leans in for a small kiss. Like he can't really get enough either. (Like he has to confirm, once more, that this is real.) ]
Y.. Yeah. I guess it would be a lot to explain if someone suddenly did show up..
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(Other than they did.)
So, maybe not getting caught and giving the wrong impression's the best idea here. His voice comes out a note higher, a bit giddy, a bitty elated as he moves back in the pool. ]
Okay! [ Okay! Cool! He knows how to do this, he knows how to act. At least the pool is fairly simple to move out of, though there's almost something that makes him want to stay. A dumb something that Tidus ignores, wet patches left around his feet on the tiling. ]
I could spend all day in that thing. [ He's gotta admit, the hot water's pretty nice. ] Remember the one on that island? The hot springs. Man, I could go for a vacation!
[ He's not talking simply to fill in any potential silence as he walks over to his gear. Nope, you can't prove it. ]
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.. they're still shaking a little when he grabs two of the towels and throws one over at Tidus. By Naga, this feels so weird. Not even necessarily a bad kind of weird, just.. weirdly exciting and nerve-inducing all at the same time. Like a kid on Christmas Eve. ]
I don't think-- I don't think they'll give us one again this soon. [ Even though that island feels like so long ago now. But in train terms, it's the first real vacation they've had. Not counting the winter faire, since that was only for a day, more a day out than a real vacation..
Also no, that's totally not him stuttering and stammering a bit. He's so cool. He's totally cool as he starts drying himself off enough to be able to put his clothes back on. ]
Maybe we should just come here more often. [ In the spa. Then again, usually there's more company than this, and Inigo isn't so fond of that idea.. ]
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[ Tidus's saving grace is also another factor: He knows how to keep his mouth going, on and on and on. He's dried and dressed as he keeps on talking, his body temperature stuffy with the clothing, but he doesn't think about that as he heads to the door, fiddling first with the controls to shut off the sound. Good bye, nature pee noises.
He lingers by the door to wait for Inigo, likely catching his eye, and delaying in looking away. Or at least, trying to make it seem natural. Sure, he's brought up about the whole friends doing more than friends do doing thing in the past, but... it doesn't mean he's ever done it before.
Is this what they're doing now? Is this for real?
His heel taps against the ground, until they're ready to go through into the corridor, heading back to their cabin. ]
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It really is a good thing there's just Tidus's running commentary as background noise. Even though Inigo feels a little guilty for having taken longer, considering he can see Tidus playing out his idle animation by the time he finally is done putting everything back on. ]
Okay-- Ready, I'm ready!
[ Eager to prove He Is Ready, Inigo quickly moves past Tidus, opening the door to leave. Bouncing on his feet with nervous energy as he heads through the corridor, in the direction of their cabin - though he turns to actually look at Tidus as he's walking, making sure the other is still following him.
And that all of this - whatever this is right now - is not just a weird hallucination he's having. ]
.. you're not really going to make Roland fight you while he's all old, are you? [ Thank Naga for a Safe Topic while they make their way back. ]
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Or maybe they woke up, and now they're ignoring what happened in said dream. But he's the one who decided not to make a deal out of it, isn't he. ]
Why not? [ And continues to go for, with the opening he has. ...so he thinks, but there's a follow-up that he hesitates to bring out - shoves his hands into his pockets, and pretends it isn't weird at all, when- ]
You gonna keep me distracted?
[ If you know what I mean.
But it doesn't come out as teasing as Tidus usually is, and his cheeks feel a pinch of warmth for even saying it after all. He won't take it back though - can't take back what's been said. ]
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What did Tidus just say.
It's a miracle that Inigo doesn't suddenly stop walking, or even worse, trip over his own feet with how startled he is at those sudden words. You gonna keep me distracted? Does Tidus mean that in the sort of way Inigo thinks he does? Usually he would assume it's not the case, that it's just some innocent teasing, but considering what they just did and what they're about to continue when they get to their cabin, it feels like the words suddenly got a very, very heavy double load.
Inigo can absolutely feel that blush starting to creep up his cheeks now. ]
W-Well..
[ What does he even say to that.
It has to be something cool! He can't make Tidus think he's lame now!
Come on, Inigo. Think. Think. ]
I, uh.. if you want me to..? [ DAMMIT, NO, THAT'S SO LAME. HE'S MENTALLY SCREAMING INTO A PILLOW RIGHT NOW. It's like he's doing an accidental speedrun on how quickly he can get Tidus turned off on the idea of ever sharing even a single kiss with him again. ]
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If he could shove his hands deeper into his pockets, he would. ]
Nevermind. Just a joke.
[ He's so glad Inigo can't see him right now, making the job more difficult by him pretending to have an interest in the side wall away from the row of doors. Wow, good thing their cabin is only one car away!
(Will Inigo still want to make out with him? ughhh) ]
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So Inigo's nervous, panic-filled brain is trying to think up more as quickly as possible. A way to deal with all of this. A way to make Tidus feel better. Think, think, think--
Oh, look. It's their cabin. Inigo quickly pulls out his ticket to open the door, glad to find that neither of their roommates are currently present.
It gives him an opportunity to make up for this awkwardness. By shoving his ticket back into a pocket on his pants as quickly as possible, and instead tug on Tidus's arms until his hands appear out of the pockets. So he can grasp those instead, tugging the other along into the room as the door shuts behind them. ]
Don't make that face.
[ You know the one. The sulky one. But Inigo says it with a tone that's weirdly warm, almost a tad vulnerable as he releases one hand to instead touch the side of Tidus's face, pulling him a bit down and closer for a kiss. ]
Or-- Is that what I need to distract you from? [ A semi-awkward callback to the joke gone wrong, but it's cute in that incredibly dorky sort of way. ]
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But Inigo reads him better, even if Tidus doesn't agree as they walk through the door - or as Inigo tugs him inside, a colour of light next to the boring wall he'd been casually viewing. Smiling, but Tidus is ready to protest that accusation, before his lips are put to another use.
And then - Tidus knows there's a reference being made here, but his mind stays a muddled mess as Inigo pulls away, trying to figure out how to respond, and quick. ]
I-- Sure?
[ Got it.
(does this mean inigo's going to kiss him again...!) ]
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If only most things in life were as easy as earning kisses from Inigo. Then again, he's quite eager to kiss Tidus - the butterflies in his stomach tell him as much every time their lips meet - so it's not like he needs much of an excuse to do so, no matter how good of an excuse Tidus's cute face when he responds so hastily is.
He lingers a bit longer this time too. Taking the lead this time, gently tugging on Tidus's (perhaps still faintly pouty) lower lip.
It lasts long enough that Inigo feels a little out of breath when he finally does pull his head back. ]
Um, if you want more, you should tell me.. Or-- Or maybe we should set some boundaries. On all of this, I mean. [ On what they're doing here. Especially since Inigo wants to know what Tidus wants out of this - he's very well aware of his own feelings, and that they don't fit as neatly into this situation. ]
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